Settling in St Louis

We are settling into our new location and so far, so good. We are living with Sue's mom (Thanks MaMa) and having a blast with the tennis courts and pool right across the street.

I've been getting a few projects and I'll start building my first table here this afternoon.

On the ministry front, we continue to be excited as we meet with folks and talk through our future. The idea of working with couples in the area is more exciting than ever. The need is evident and the support seems to keep building.

We hope to use the next few months to meet with pastors from the area and continue to develop the program. We really feel like pre-marital classes will be our niche as we get our ministry started.

I'd love your feedback and we really need a name. Send us your ideas by either adding a comment here or emailing us at sckraft@gmail.com.

Thanks for your prayers.

Go Cardinals!

Making a Move

So we have finally done it. We are making the move. After much prayer and talking and soul searching and tears and laughter and on and on we have decided to make the move back to St Louis. Sue and I have moved a lot (that's an understatement) in our almost 12 years of marriage.

Just for fun, let's retrace our steps. Prior to marriage Sue was in Houston teaching and I went there for student teaching. After graduating, we lived in Story City, Iowa. We moved from there to Nashville, TN. We then went to Cedar Rapids, IA. Parker, CO was our next stop. From Parker to St Louis, MO. On to Charlotte, NC and now we are loading up for a trip back to St Louis.

You may think we are crazy (and you'd be right) but I stand here today and say I wouldn't trade it for anything. The most important thing we have in this world is relationships. Sue and I have friends all over the country. We look back on our moves and in every city we've lived in we have memories of close friendships. We are blessed with the chance to look at each move and see an impact that God allowed us to have in someone's life.

As great as it has been though, we are ready to settle. We are ready to settle for our kid's sake (Will starts Kindergarten) and for our sake. Sue and I look forward to forging strong friendships. We look forward to investing in an area and having an impact.

St Louis has it good and bad aspects (every place does). Those good aspects though are really really good. We love being close to family. We love the fact that Grandma is right there and Uncle Greg and Aunt Kerry (and of course Thomas and Colin) are close. Iowa is less than a days' drive away for all of my family.

We have close friends in St Louis. Sue's friends from years ago (KHS days). Sue's aunts, uncles and cousins. Our friends from Trinity. Our fellow dog lovers.

We Love the Cardinals, the zoo, the spring, summer and fall (winter stinks). We love the friendliness of people.

Overall it is just a great place and we are excited to be moving there (again).

As we pack up and leave Charlotte, we are sad too. We were here a little over two years and we will miss our friendships. We'll miss our small group that has met nearly every week for the past 14+ months. We have gained friends for life and for that we are so grateful.

To those of you who think we are crazy for moving so much, most likely you are a friend because of our willingness to move. We wouldn't trade our friendship with you for one less stressful move.

Thanks for loving us. Thanks for your prayers.

Barry, Sue and the Boys

God is Providing

Sue and I are still searching for the next step. We have had times of stress and questioning but God has come through in a big way by providing for us. I have been able to get a couple construction jobs through Craigslist (http://www.craigslist.org/). What an awesome web service. I've heard that the guy who started it has been offered millions to sell it and refuses. He wants to keep it free. Thanks you Mr. Craigslist! I built a table for a couple here in Huntersville. It was a fun project. I have about 3 other jobs lined up right now. I enjoy doing the jobs and it is good $.

My neighbor has his own Marketing/Communications Company and has asked if I'd be willing to seek out some new clients. He and his business partner have a great business plan. They work sort of like General Contractors. They have a pretty large pool of marketing and web folks and they put together a custom team to work with each client. I'm enjoying it and hope to help him for awhile.

So if you know anyone who needs a table or a $25,000+ marketing campaign or website, let me know. I know many of you are always kidding me about having my hand in about 10 different things at a time. You are exactly right. It keeps me on my toes.

A Short Rant

I wrote most of this in an email to a close friend of ours and wanted to share some of these thoughts here. (Thanks for the inspiration Bette!)
I think the church and the world of counseling just have it wrong. Sure marriages need repair at times but why aren't we preparing couples for marriage? Why aren't we giving couples the tools they need to do life together, to serve together to love each other? It is the most important earthly bond and how much do you see churches focusing on it. You see churches once in awhile promote a marriage retreat. Or you see churches have divorce care. I've never met a person who gets married and says, "Man I hope I have an unhappy life now" or I've never seen a instance where the husband or wife get married expecting to fail. Yet with that being the case, half of the marriages end in divorce. The statistics are the same for Christian marriages. Many more aren't fulfilled in their marriage. The sad truth is the majority of marriages simply aren't happy relationships. They are ending in divorce or the couples stick together because of the shame involved in divorce or they stay together for the kids. So if all the couples getting married in our churches want to succeed in their marriage, why aren't they? I believe it is because we aren't preparing them. We aren't giving them the tools to be successful in a marriage relationship.
So what can we do? The issue is obvious. The circumstances are evident. I believe we need to hold churches to a higher expectation. We need churches to demand that couples do more than just get together a few times with the pastor to talk through logistics. We need to do more for these couples during their first few years of marriage.
This issue has captured our hearts more than any other. Trained and devoted couples serve better together, they are better parents, they are more effective in ministry, they are able to work through hard times, on and on.
Marriage Plus is an amazing ministry. We spent a couple days with Gary and Ann Wooley who started Marriage plus in the early 90's. Their couples "training" is effective and the fruit is evident. Teaching couples to become disciples and showing them the importance of community and relationship simply works. 160 couples have completed the 13-15 month marriage plus course in Denver alone over the past 15 years or so. I believe all but 3 are together today. They are active in leadership in churches. They are serving together. They have learned to marry their giftedness and personalities. They know the importance of the listening aspect of communication. They have talked through the tough issues of intimacy.
We would love to help Marriage Plus have a broader impact. We pray that doors open up to allow us to do it. Thanks for your continued prayers.

Colorado fun

Wow! What an amazing trip to Denver, Colorado! It seems that my response is the same everytime I get a chance to breathe that mountain air and catch up with good friends and family. I feel such joy and peace while in the Rocky Mountain state.

I can easily praise God as I soaked up all that Colorado goodness! But what about when waiting on making a decision about a job? Well, I would like to say that I am praising God, but the reality is, I am reserving praise for the moment Barry and I are "employed". In so realizing my reservation, I am convicted to find a way to praise God in the midst of unemployment.

So here goes,..."Thank you, Lord, for my family; for our good health; for our amazing friends; for providing for us: our house and plenty of food. And, um, on that note,...please, please help us pay the bills next month!" So how much faith do I really have that God provides?

My tutoring jobs have suddenly begun and are coming at me quickly. The phone rang as I was typing this message,...a substitute teaching job. "Thank you, God, for showing me that You are in control and Your timing is perfect!"
~Sue

Come on God!

So many possibilities, so many choices in front of us. We leave tomorrow morning for Colorado to explore some opportunities. The kids are excited to fly on an airplane. They have been counting down the days to fly out and see their cousins.

I can't begin to even write about the wide range of feelings and emotions that are flying around our house these days. Fear, excitement, worry and even a little anger. We are catching ourselves being short with our kids and not showing the patience we should. God can teach you so much in times like this.

Sue and I are teaching tonight about Matthew 11:6 "Happy is he who isn't offended by me." or "God blesses those who are not offended by me". This was Jesus response to John the Baptist's disciples who questioned Jesus because John was in prison and it seems he wanted Jesus to help him out. Instead of going to help John, this is the message he sent back to John.

I believe Jesus is basically saying, "Don't let my inaction cause you to stumble. I'm going to do things that don't make sense to you. I am operating in the realm of eternal and you are only able to think in the realm of temporary."

I am sure this isn't was John expected or wanted.

Wouldn't it be nice if God responded and acted the way we wanted him to. Sue and I would love a clear message of what, when and where we are supposed to be and what we are supposed to do. Instead he leaves those decisions up to us.

I believe God is just waiting on us to make a faithful decision. No one decision is more "right" then the next. So instead of being "offended" that God isn't making a right choice clear for us, we need to rejoice in the fact that he can and will bless us in any circumstance or decision we make. That is, as long as we make it with our eyes fixed firmly on Him.

Truth is, our next move might not work out the way we want. We may be in a similar situation two years from now (God, Please don't let it be). God will remain sovereign and just though.

In the eternal realm, no matter what happens here, our future is bright. Our eternity is set. Heaven is real and I'll be there. Hope you'll be too.

Off to the Mountains

We are heading to Colorado next week to talk to a few folks. We are excited about the trip. We'll be out there for 6 days and it is looking like we'll be busy.

Sue and I are going to be spending as much time as possible with Gary and Ann from Marriage Plus. We're anxious to hear more about their dreams for their ministry and see if there is a place there for us.

My brain doesn't stop thinking through what the next steps will be in our lives. Wouldn't it be nice if we just had a phone number to call and hear God's advice? It is no wonder that there is such a huge market for bogus forture tellers.

I'm working with two close friends who are designers. Bryan, Scott and myself are having a great time with Brown Cow (www.gobrowncow.com). Bryan and I were in Atlanta this week at a church planters conference. We met a lot of great folks. We'll see if our hours of talking will pay off and turn into some clients. I was inspired to see all the people with hopes of starting a church. What a huge leap of faith for them.

Well, keep us in your prayers as we continue to work through these decisions.

Thanks for the love!